Companionship and befriending services for older adults
Learn about companionship and befriending service options for older adults
There are a number of reasons older adults may become more isolated as they age. For those living alone, or who struggle with mobility or health issues that make it difficult to leave home and attend social gatherings, feelings of loneliness can become a real problem. In these cases, a companionship or befriending service could be extremely beneficial.
Here, we are exploring what a befriending service is, the benefits of arranging this, who could best make use of a service like this, the risks of loneliness in older people, how to broach the subject with your loved one, how to find a befriending service, and other ways older people can make new friends.
At Home Instead, our aim is to help people age positively and in place by bringing expert care to their home. For nearly 20 years, we have been providing the highest standard of care, and creating industry-leading training programmes for our Care Professionals that are accredited by nursing and medical professionals. Today, we are the world’s largest global domiciliary care network, supporting over 100,000 older adults with personalised, tailored care at home. So whatever questions you have about companionship services, we can help.
What is a befriending service?
A befriending service is an initiative set up for older adults that provides companionship and emotional support for those living alone or who do not get many chances to interact with others. Befriending services can be very effective at tackling loneliness and social isolation in older adults, which can become a serious issue if ignored.
These services are typically run by volunteers or trained staff that will make regular visits to a person’s home, or may call an older person on the phone to engage in friendly conversation or organise enjoyable activities. Some befriending services may even organise day trips or outings to help the person leave their home and enjoy a change of scenery, or could provide practical assistance such as running errands with them or accompanying them to appointments.
There are a number of reasons an older person may lack sufficient social connections, so a befriending service can help those who:
- Have mobility issues and would like to get out more, or cannot leave their home
- Live alone and do not have many friends or family members nearby
- Have suffered a bereavement and are struggling to cope alone
- Are worried about their return from hospital and would like someone to check in
- Are feeling generally lonely and would like to talk to someone
Befrienders or companions can offer a listening ear and facilitate a place for them to speak about anything that may be bothering them, or just engage in friendly chats with no particular goal. Befriending services can help to improve mental wellbeing and quality of life, and help older people feel more connected to their community.
What are the benefits of a befriending service?
According to Age UK, around 1.4 million older people in the UK say they are often lonely, and over 1 million say they sometimes go over a month without speaking to someone, be it a friend, family member or neighbour. A befriending service has many benefits for the mental health of an older person. For example:
- Companionship could help to improve an older person’s mental health after suffering a bereavement, and help them move past feelings of loss
- A befriending service could help an older person improve their confidence levels and self-esteem so they begin to feel comfortable doing more on their own
- Family members of an older person may feel a sense of relief knowing someone is visiting their loved one every week, especially if they are not able to visit as often as they would like to
- A befriending service could offer an improved quality of life for older adults, as they may offer to help with things like laundry or other chores the person struggles with – you should always confirm the parameters of what your befriending service offers so you are both on the same page with what services they are comfortable providing
There is a lot of research to support the many benefits of a befriending or companionship service, with one study of over 2,000 veterans aged 60+ finding that while 44% of them reported feeling lonely, the study concluded feelings of loneliness could be improved with social support.
Studies also show there is no one-size-fits-all solution for loneliness in older people, as the feeling is very personal and individual to each person’s situation. For this reason, befriending services could be beneficial as the companion assigned to the older person can tailor their intervention to the person’s needs and how they are feeling.
Who benefits from a befriending service?
Anyone can make use of a befriending service if they are feeling isolated or lonely, however this service is particularly popular with older adults. This is typically due to the higher likelihood that they live alone, or have mobility issues that make it difficult to get out of the house and socialise.
In addition, family members or even family caregivers looking after an older adult may feel more comfortable leaving their loved one for longer each week if they know there will be someone visiting to keep them company.
Many older people refrain from talking to anyone about their loneliness, or may avoid getting in touch with a befriending service out of embarrassment or shame. It is helpful for them to know that volunteers working for befriending services also gain a lot from their interactions, such as a sense of fulfilment and purpose from making a positive impact on someone’s life, as well as the general enjoyment of a chat, a cup of tea, or a fun activity. If you are on the fence about reaching out to a befriending service, remember most volunteers will be keen to hear from you and begin a friendship, and will get a lot out of the experience themselves.
What are the risks of loneliness in older adults?
Loneliness in older adults can pose risks to their physical health as well as their mental health and emotional wellbeing, and often it is not clear just how much damage social isolation can do. Aside from feelings of sadness, hopelessness or worthlessness, and contributing to unhealthy behaviours such as eating a poor diet or a sedentary lifestyle, loneliness can lead to health complications:
- Research from The Health Foundation found that 21% of older people living alone will visit their GP at least once a month, compared to the 14% of older people who visit their GP at least once a month and live with someone else.
- According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, social isolation has been linked to an estimated 50% increased risk of dementia and other serious medical conditions in older adults.
- Research has found loneliness to be associated with a 29% increased risk of heart disease, a 32% increased risk of stroke, a higher rate of depression and suicide, and a higher risk of premature death than smoking.
It is thought that living alone can cause more long-term health conditions for older adults, with studies finding 49.8% of patients aged 65+ living alone have 3 or more long-term conditions, compared to just 42.2% of older people who live with others.
How can you discuss a befriending service with a loved one?
Some older people may feel reluctant to share that they are feeling lonely, or to ask about companionship or befriending services due to feeling ashamed, embarrassed, or that they do not want to upset or bother their loved ones. There are a number of signs that an older person may be feeling lonely, such as:
- They become physically weaker
- They show signs of depression or anxiety
- They seem to be withdrawing from social interactions or events
- They are becoming more dependent on others
- They are not taking care of their personal hygiene
- They are not eating enough
- They are not sleeping enough
- They are experiencing more and more physical health issues
You can read more about this in our guide to signs of loneliness in older people.
If you think it may be time to discuss loneliness and the possible need for a befriending service with your older loved one, it is best to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding for their situation. You could start by highlighting the issues of loneliness and expressing concern for their wellbeing in this regard, as well as acknowledging any challenges they may currently be facing.
Tell them about the positive aspects of a befriending service, such as companionship, emotional support, and fun opportunities for social interaction in their community. You may wish to highlight that the service could help them to feel less lonely when you cannot visit.
Remember to also listen to their thoughts and concerns, and answer any questions they have. If they seem hesitant to go forward and sign up to a service, let them know there is never any obligation to commit, and it may be worth a try once or twice to see if the service could be a good fit and an enjoyable experience for them.
How can I find a befriending service for older people?
There are many befriending services around that you can sign up to easily, either for yourself or on behalf of a loved one (with their permission). Often these will be individual organisations, charities or religious groups, and many can be found simply by searching the internet. If you cannot search this way, you may find details of organisations in your local community centre, nearby shops or your doctor’s surgery.
Below are some organisations in the UK that offer befriending services, and may be a good place to start your search:
- The Silver Line is run by Age UK, and offers a free and confidential telephone service where older adults can phone at any time of day or night to talk. Whether for a light-hearted chat or to discuss their mental health or feelings of loneliness, The Silver Line can help. You can call on 0800 4 70 80 90.
“I used The Silver Line every night for about three weeks, and it really kept me going. They’re lovely, I’ve not spoken to anybody that I haven’t felt has been listening or engaging. I can put my hand on my heart and say I don’t think I’d be here without them.”
– Rachel, a Silver Line caller
- Age UK can also arrange face-to-face befriending services through their local organisations, so you can reach out to find befrienders in your area. These in-person befrienders can visit you in your home, accompany you to a particular activity, or meet you out somewhere if you would prefer. You can find information on your local Age UK here.
- Independent Age is a charity aiming to address issues older people face, including loneliness, and their free and confidential helpline is available to call 24/7 if you ever need advice or to be connected with services in your area that could help. You can reach them on 0800 319 6789.
- Mind is a charity focused on mental health issues, and they have local centres all over the country running events, social groups and individual assistance for those facing mental health issues or loneliness. You can find your nearest Mind branch using their online search.
- Befriending Networks offer training for those who would like to become a befriender in the UK, but they also have a ‘Find A Befriender’ directory on their website that could help you find other organisations in your local area.
- If you would prefer to meet with a befriender one-on-one and in-person, home care organisations often offer companionship services. At Home Instead, our companionship service can help by providing a friendly face-to-face chat as often as you like, someone to accompany you to activities or appointments, or someone to help encourage socialisation, exercise and more.
What other ways can older people make new friends?
It can be especially difficult for older adults to make new friends and connect with their community, especially when they struggle with health or mobility issues that make it harder for them to leave home on a regular basis, or to receive visitors at home. However, there are ways to grow your circle of friends, and many benefits to pushing through the fear you have of making new ones.
To do this, you could try:
- Looking at what local classes or community groups are run near your home. For example, your local community centre might offer a craft class, a book club, a social dancing event, or something as simple as a coffee chat meetup once a week. Also, your local leisure centre may provide exercise classes designed for older adults. If you are worried about attending, you may want to reach out to the person who runs the event first to ask any questions you have, or request to be paired with someone who has experience in whatever the activity is.
- If you are able, consider volunteering for a charity or organisation. Often charities, hospitals or local action groups will provide resources and opportunities for people to volunteer for causes, and this can be a great way to meet other people as well as contribute to something you care about. If you do not feel able to commit to a specific charity, you could focus on visiting other older adults in hospital or in local care homes to spend time with them.
- If you are religious, connect with your local church or other religious organisations, as they often have services, events and gatherings that are a great way to get to know others in your area.
- Try hobbies that encourage conversations and facilitate interaction with others. If you enjoy gardening, spend time in your garden chatting to neighbours. If you like reading, take your book to a local park bench to do this, and speak to passers-by who may wish to chat.
- While in-person discussions are usually more fulfilling, you can also use online platforms such as forums or social media networks like Facebook to create connections and find others in your area.
Ultimately, the more open-minded and proactive you are in seeking social opportunities, the more meaningful friendships and connections you will be able to make.
If you would like to learn more about the companionship service we offer, feel free to get in with your local Home Instead office to find out more. Our Care Professionals are the best of the best, and highly trained to deliver the services you need. Plus, during our selection process, we look for people who enjoy similar interests so we can find the right person to provide companionship for you. No matter what type of home care you are looking for, we can offer a tailored service that suits you or your loved one.
We’re an award-winning home care provider and part of a worldwide organisation devoted to providing the highest-quality relationship-led care for older people in their own homes. Arranging home care for yourself or your loved one shouldn’t be stressful, so whatever questions you would like answered, feel free to reach out to the Home Instead team to discuss your needs.